Monday, May 14, 2012

Looking for a day of a more perfect union

My baby daughter doesn't talk too much to other people, but she is very chatty to me and her mom. After I moved into a new big city (while she and her mom are still staying in my hometown), she is calling me regularly: early morning and evening. 

If we do video call, her mom is sitting beside her, my baby daughter doesn't speak much; but when she calls my cell, she speaks louder than usual, talks a lot, and she doesn't want to hang up.

One day, early last week, I was driving to my new office, she called me:

  "Daddy, where are you? You come quick. because... because... "

probably she did not have many ideas of reasons that she should make out of.

  "... because ... because I want to play with you. You come quick. OK?"

It was very hard for me that I can't be there for her. It was really difficult to convince her why we can't be together right now. I'm just saying that I'll be back with beautiful dresses and (silk) shoes. (비단 구두)

She called me again that night:

  "Dad, where are you? You come quick. You come quick. Because..."
  "Because, I made muffins. I want to eat together with you. OK?"

Oh, man... Oh, God. Please... please help me, help me stand strong.

      "Baby, I cannot talk to you right now, I'm driving."

There was a little silence there, and she was saying:

  "Daddy, you are driving? you are coming home? OK! OK! 끊어? 끊어?"*
      "Yes, 끊어."

I stopped my car on the side, and I could not drive for a while.

*"끊어?" means "hang up the phone?" She mixes Korean.